Modern culture is deeply confused about the feminine. We’re taught to value the traits of the masculine, drive, ambition, productivity, and goal-orientation, in everyone, including women. We celebrate the female CEO, the “girlboss,” the woman who can “do it all.” And while there is nothing wrong with a woman being successful in the world, we have made a grave error in believing that this is the totality of her power. We have forgotten the profound, magnetic, and life-giving power of feminine energy.
Feminine energy is not about being weak, passive, or submissive. That’s a pathetic caricature. True feminine energy is a force of nature. It is the energy of creation, of connection, of intuition, of being. While the masculine is about doing, the feminine is about being. It’s a radiant, flowing, and receptive energy. It’s the energy of the artist, the dancer, the healer. It’s the energy that makes life worth living.
Here’s what you, as a man, need to understand: a woman is most alive, most radiant, and most sexually open when she is in her feminine essence. But for her to feel safe enough to drop into that state, she needs to be in the presence of a strong, grounded masculine energy. She needs to know that you’ve got this. That you can handle the logistics of the world, that you can provide a container of safety, so that she can let go of her own masculine armor—the armor she has to wear every day to survive in a masculine-dominated world.
When you come home from work and start peppering her with questions about her to-do list, her productivity, her goals, you are keeping her in her masculine energy. You are treating her like another CEO, another business partner. This is the death of polarity. She doesn’t want to be your business partner in the bedroom. She wants to be your queen. She wants to be ravished, adored, and worshipped.
Your job is to become the man who can invite her out of her head and into her body. You do this by:
•Creating a space of non-judgment: She needs to know that she can be her wild, emotional, messy, and magnificent self with you, and you will not run away. You will not tell her she’s being “crazy” or “irrational.” You will simply be there, a calm and loving presence.
•Taking the lead: Plan the date. Initiate the sex. Make the decision. When you take the burden of leadership off of her shoulders, you give her the gift of surrender. And a woman who can surrender to her man is a woman who is fully alive.
•Appreciating her radiance: Tell her she’s beautiful. Admire her. Drink in her essence. Let her know that her very being is a gift to you. Your focused, masculine attention is the fuel that feeds her feminine fire.
When a woman is fully in her feminine energy, she is a force to be reckoned with. She will nurture you, inspire you, and fuck your brains out. She will fill your life with a richness and a depth that you cannot even imagine. But she will only give you this gift if you are man enough to receive it. You must be the king to her queen. You must be the rock against which her beautiful, wild ocean can crash.
If you’re ready to go deeper, don’t just surround yourself with talk—build the kind of skill and awareness your partner feels in every moment. The Foreplay Course gives you the training to create stronger connection, sharper confidence, and real sexual leadership.
A woman becomes most radiant when a man is strong enough to let her soften.
